Meetings

The note below is an article I had saved from my college days. Given the message it reads, this is NOT meant to offend anyone on our Committee, forum or club; please read it in the context it is meant and the title is the giveaway.

Should anyone have cause to be offended; please accept my sincere apologies as I have clearly no such intention.

(Reproduced from the May, 1986 edition of the Institute of the Motor Industry- Management Journal, their reference was from the Certified Secretaries Journal).

"In Lighter Vein"

Twenty points on how NOT to support your Region or Centre:

               1.   Don't go to the meetings.

               2.   If you go, arrive late.

               3.   If you do not attend a meeting, find faults with the work done by those present.

               4.   Never accept office, it is much easier to criticise.

               5.   Never-the-less, get sore if you are not appointed on a committee.

               6.   If asked by the Chairman to give your opinion on some important matter, tell him you have nothing to say; after the meeting,    tell everyone on how things ought to be done.

               7.   Do nothing more than is absolutely necessary, but when others work unselfishly and to the best of their ability, say that the Institute is run by a Clique. (Clique - small exclusive group).

               8.   If you change your address, don't tell the Hon. Secretary.

               9.   When Dinner is given, tell everybody money is being wasted.

              10.  When no dinner is given, say the Institute is dead.

              11.  Don't ask for a ticket until they are all sold.

              12.  Then swear you have been cheated out of yours.

              13.  Don't tell the Institute on how it can help you, but if it does not help you, say it is no good.

              14.  If you receive service without joining, don't think of joining.

              15.  Keep your eyes for something wrong, and when you find it - howl.

              16.  When you attend a meeting, vote to do something and then go home and do the opposite.

              17.  Agree with everything said at a meeting and then go home and do the opposite.

              18.  When asked for information, don't give it.

              19.  Criticise the Institute for incompleteness of information.

              20.  When asked to publicise a meeting, slip the request into the waste paper basket and forget all about it.

I have omitted one offensive comment from the above as it advocated violence.

I suppose some ‘certified’ secretary dreamt this up in one of her meetings.